Please Don't Go
by ill-interrogate-the-cat
Summary: Castiel is given a choice: tablet or Winchesters.Of course he chose the Winchesters as they always come ough when he gives Naomi the tablet, she also forcibly takes his grace. He wakes up in a strange place which he later finds out is the Winchesters' home. He wants nothing more but to stay but with Sam sick, he doesn't think its fair for Dean to have to worry about him too
1. Chapter 1

_**Summary:**_

**She stepped closer. "Give me the tablet, Castiel, or I will find your beloved Winchesters and I will kill them."** **-** **Castiel is given a choice: The tablet or the Winchesters. Of course he chose the Winchesters as they always come first. Though, when he gives Naomi the tablet, she also forcibly takes his grace. He wakes up in A strange place which he later finds out is the Winchesters' home. Thanks to his new feelings, Castiel finds out that he may want to be more than a brother to Dean but he doesn't want to be a burden on him while Sam is sick so tells him that he's leaving. Dean tells him that that's all Cas does: Leaves then he just waltzes back into their lives. Dean's sick of it and says that is Cas goes then he doesn't want him to come back. Cas does what he thinks is best.** **-** **"Cas," Dean said, his voice wavering a bit. "You're my brother, Cas, please don't leave. Not again."** **"Maybe I don't want to be your brother…" he quietly said. 'I want to be more than that to you,' he thinks.**

* * *

Castiel is in another Biggerson's in another town. It's almost been two weeks since he got the tablet and left the Winchesters to ensure their safety. Sometimes, while listening to their prayers, Cas is tempted to just abandon the tablet so he can go back to his family that cares about him: Sam and Dean Winchester. He'd be there now if he could, but he doesn't want the chance of angels following him to where they are. They have much to worry about already; they don't need to add angels to that list.

There is also another reason why Castiel doesn't go to the Winchesters right now. He thinks that after what he's done to them, what he's done to _Dean,_ he doesn't deserve the happiness he feels when with them. And he's sure that, despite his prayers, Dean doesn't want to see him. Cas nearly killed him. Castiel still isn't sure what broke the connection between him and Naomi but he thinks it may have something to do with Dean saying that he needs him and that they were family. To Dean, nothing's more important than family. This should make Cas feel blissful but it doesn't. It makes him feel guilty because through the past few years he's only been hurting Dean and Sam, and many more for that matter, but he somehow always hurts Dean the most. He always breaks his trust somehow but Dean forgives him for reasons that he doesn't know.

Castiel has made his decision on what he will do. He's going to bring the tablet to Kevin like Dean had wanted to do then wait for one of the Winchesters to pray to him so he can return to them once again. It's a simple plan, nothing could go wrong. Well, that is until now, before he even got to start. During his time of thinking, the angels caught up to him.

"Castiel," said an irritated female voice from behind him. Cas didn't have to turn around to know it was Naomi. "Give us the tablet, Castiel. Let it return to Heaven, where it belongs." She took a step closer to him and he took a step farther. "After all you did to Heaven, we deserve for you to do this for us."

Castiel narrowed his eyes at her. "You tried to make me kill Dean. He has never done anything wrong."

"He corrupted you! He and his brother changed the prophecies!" She glared at him with much hatred. "You know, Castiel, if you human they'd probably not want you there anymore. They only 'care' about you because you can be of use to them."

Cas shook his head and met her glare. He knew that she was trying to mess with his head but it still hurt to hear that. "That's not true. I know it's not. He said that we are like family and that I am a brother to him." Castiel desperately wanted to believe that he was right but now he was remembering that day, back when he helped the Winchesters and Bobby go after Eve. Eve made his powers not work and Dean had said that without his powers he was just as useful as 'a baby in a trench coat.' This memory made him break their gaze.

"You know I'm right, Castiel. And if you don't give me the tablet I will remove your grace."

"Take my grace," he said bravely. He knows the Winchester won't leave him just because he lacks powers.

She tilted her head a bit. "You being so willing to give up your grace makes me want to go a bit higher." She stepped closer. "Give me the tablet, Castiel, or I will find your beloved Winchesters and I will kill them." This made Cas' head spin. He knew he shouldn't give her the tablet, yet he of course didn't want Sam and Dean to die. Then again, if she did kill him, he could always go back to Heaven and bring them back to life. But knowing Naomi, she would probably make sure he couldn't do that. Still, the thought of them dying hurt Castiel a lot.

He brought his attention back to where Naomi was standing and noticed that she wasn't there. She wasn't anywhere her. Instantly Cas started to panic. Has she gone looking for them? Has she found them? Did she just leave to trick Castiel into saying he will hand the tablet over to her? He didn't take the chance.

"Naomi, fine, I'll give you the tablet," he said in defeat. "Just don't hurt the Winchesters." Almost instantly Naomi came back with a smirk on her face.

"Good choice." Castiel handed her the tablet then all of a sudden, angels took his arms. He gave her a quizzical look asking what was going on. "Oh, well since you took so long, I'm going to take your grace anyways. Let's just hope you're right about your little pets." After that, all went dark.

_"_Hey there, Castiel!_" Castiel knew that voice. He turned around and saw where it came from. He was right. It's he brother._

_ "_Gabriel? I thought you had died years ago._" Cas didn't know how to comprehend this. He knows that he died. Lucifer killed him in the hotel._

_ "_Castiel, I kill people for a living. Luci couldn't get rid of me that easily._" Gabriel unwrapped a sucker and popped it in his mouth. Castiel finally looked around. He didn't know where he was; he's never seen this place before. Gabriel saw him looking around and said, "You like it? This is Sammy and Dean-o's home."_

_ "_Their home,_" he repeated to his brother._

_ "_You got it! Do you like it? I like it._" _

_ Castiel was beyond confused. Why would they have a home if they're moving around all the time? This isn't making much sense. "_Did they… Quit hunting?_" That was the only reason why Dean and Sam would get a home, right?_

_ "_Nah, they got this place from their grandfather from their dad's side of the family. He was part of this secret organization called 'The Men of Letters' and your boys here are legacies. Ever since he came from the past looking for their father, they've been living here. This place has everything._"_

_ "_How do all this?_" Castiel asked honestly wanting to know. _

_ "_Well, since you left them, hell, ever since you came back from Purgatory, someone had to make sure they didn't get themselves killed. Again._" Castiel looked down at the ground feeling guilty._

_ "_If this is their home, then where are they right now?_"_

_ "_They're here. You're just dreaming. Since you're human now you're gunna be dreaming a lot._" Gabriel chuckled a bit. "_Anyway, I'll give you a tour of this place._"_

_ Cas nodded and followed his brother. "_Does Sam and Dean know you're alive and watching over them?_" He asked as they entered what he could assume was the kitchen._

_ "_Nah, not really. Sam somehow knew, or guessed maybe, since he prayed to me to try to bring you back to them since Dean was going crazy or something. But I know Dean doesn't know._" Gabriel led them down the hall to a bedroom. "_Welcome to Sammy's room where he's been sick ever since he came back from Hell and Purgatory with dear ol' Bobby's soul._"_

_ Cas' eyes went wide with shock. "_Sam went to Hell and Purgatory?_"_

_ "_Yeah, bro, for the second trial. They got stuck there too. Which is when Dean-o prayed to you but you didn't answer so he did what he had to; he called up that vampire friend of his and asked if he will go and same Sam and Bobby. The vamp said sure and I guess you can piece up the rest._"_

_ "_Did Benny come back?_"_

_ "_Nah, Sammy boy said something about him saying he didn't want to come back._" Castiel nodded and they walked farther down the hall. His human experience so far has been awful and he's only been dreaming._

_ Gabriel showed him the bathroom and they made their way to the next bedroom. There were guns hanging on the wall and since they passed Sam's room already, this was obviously Dean's. _

_ "_This is where you are. While you were sleeping I found you and brought you here so the boy's would quit their whining. Anyway, they came home from talking with Metatron-_"_

_ "_-They found Metatron?_" Castiel interrupted with astonishment._

_ "_Yeah, but that's not the idea of this story right now. Anyway, so they came home and then they saw you lying in the middle of the floor. While you were sleeping they did those tests, blah blah, then Dean brought you to his room and he's been sitting in that chair,_" he pointed to a chair in the room, "_ever since._"_

_ "_How long has that been?_" Castiel, for some reason, couldn't take his eyes away from the chair. The chair that Dean was sitting in watching after Cas. He used to be the one watching Dean when he was asleep, making sure he was safe. Now it's Dean watching him._

_ Gabriel looked at his bare wrist, as if looking at a watch. "_Oh, about… Sixty hours?_"_

_He looked over to Castiel. "_I'll wake you up now. Tell the boys I say 'howdy'._" At that, Gabriel snapped his fingers and his dream shattered. _

Castiel took a sharp inhale and bolted up and immediately regretted that as he felt dizzy. He instantly felt someone by his side. Though his eyes were blurry he knew it was Dean. He grabbed on to him and tried to stand up.

"Woah, Cas, don't try standing up. You've just been sleeping for two and a half days, at least get used to being awake." Dean gently pushed Castiel down to laying position. Dean gave him a glass of water and Cas gladly drank from it.

"Dean, I am more than capable of standing up." Cas knew that that was probably a lie but he didn't want to seem weak. His vision cleared up and he saw that Dean didn't believe what he said either.

"Okay, then stand up right now. We'll see who's right." Castiel narrowed his blue eyes and Dean and slowly made his way to sitting position. When he got up, he slowly started to stand up. He did it! He stood up. "Okay, now walk." Cas took one step and fell but before he hit the hard floor, Dean caught his arm. The touch made Castiel shiver, not due to coldness, but due to something else, something he can't quite understand. He muttered a thanks to Dean when he helped him back to bed.

"Gabriel told me to tell you and Sam that he said 'howdy', by the way," Cas told Dean after a moment of silence, using air quotes.

"Cas, buddy, Gabriel died years ago, man," Dean told him.

"I know that Dean, that's what I told him but I guess if you 'kill people for a living' you can't get 'rid of easily'."

"Dude, enough with the air quotes!"

Castiel just nodded and continued. "He said that somehow Sam knew that he was alive and prayed to him sometimes. And I'm sorry to hear about Sam, Dean."

"What do you mean, Cas? What about Sammy?" Cas could hear the hint of anger in his voice.

"Gabriel told me that he's been getting sicker ever since he came back from Hell and Purgatory with Bobby's soul." Castiel looked away from Dean. "And I'm sorry about Benny."

"What?" Dean yelled. "Has he been spying on us too?"

"No Dean! He's been protecting you while I was gone!" He ignored the pain in his head as he yelled back.

"Right, about that, don't you have that tablet you have to be protecting right now? You know, the one you tried to kill me over?"

"I… I don't have it anymore," Castiel whispered, refusing to meet Dean's gaze.

"What do you mean you don't have it?" Castiel remained silent. "Damn it, Cas! Answer me! Where is it?"

Suddenly Cas filled up with anger. He didn't know why, he just did. "Naomi has it, along with my grace! Do you want to know why, Dean?" Dean just stood in silence, obviously shocked by the outburst, so Castiel continued. "Because she threatened that she will kill you unless I complied!" He looked away and in a softer voice said, "When will you understand that all I do, I do for you?" Just then there was a sound of wings coming from the left side Cas.

"Woah there you two, save your love fights for a time when there isn't a fatally sick sasquatch in the next room trying to get some sleep." Both Cas and Dean glared at Gabriel.

After a few seconds of silence Dean scoffed. "So Cas isn't crazy; you are somehow alive." He looked right into the archangel's eyes and muttered loud enough so he can hear, "Bummer."

"Aw, come on, Dean-o! You, me, and Sammy had some fun times together!" The archangel's voice had an amused tone to it.

Dean huffed. "Yeah, 'cause me dying hundreds of times is always a bonding time. Oh, and trapping us in TV land is always great too."

Gabriel smirked. "Glad you see it my way, pal!" He then pointed a finger at the two of them. "Now keep it down or I'll send you back to where Balthazar sent you before," he sternly said to Dean before flying off.

Dean turned to Castiel now. "I hate your family, man." The ex-angel narrowed his eyes at him displeasingly.

"He is only trying to help, Dean."

"I realize that, Cas, but he's still a dick."

Castiel's eyes hardened a bit. "He is my brother, Dean; my family. How would you feel if I made suck comments about Sam?"

"He left you, Cas," Dean states angrily. "Me and Sammy, we haven't left you."

"And I left you, Dean," Castiel retorts, "many times and yet you always forgive me."

"Because that's what family does!"

"Then why can't I forgive my family, Dean?" He didn't wait for an answer. Instead he tried to stand up again.

"What are you doing?" Dean asked anger still in his voice but with a hint of worry. "You're still not well enough to try to walk."

Cas just nodded and asked his brother to come to the room quick. "What is it, Cas?"

"Can you heal me so I am able to walk, please?" With a nod the archangel placed a hand on Castiel. He gave him a silent thanks and Gabriel left the room. The dark haired man got out of bed and went to the kitchen to find a plastic bag and packed some boxed food and some water. He returned in the room seeing Dean was still in the same spot with a confused look on his face.

"Now what are you doing?"

Castiel turned to regard him. "I am leaving, Dean." Dean's eyes went wide. "It is not fair for you to be burdened by… 'A baby in a trench coat.'"

Dean huffed humorlessly. "You always do this, Cas. You leave then when we get used to you being gone, you somehow just waltz right back in. Well, I'm sick of it. You're either staying or you're leaving – for good."

Castiel froze in place. He wasn't planning on leaving forever. He was planning on visiting them. He just couldn't stay here and burden the Winchesters. With his new human feelings he was starting to believe Naomi's words from earlier. Without his powers he is of no use to Sam and Dean anymore. Why would they want him to stay? Dean does often say he is family, his brother, and he knows that to be considered as a brother to Dean means that he was important in Dean's eyes. But still, with Sam being sick, he couldn't be an imposition on the elder Winchester so he did what he thought was best.

"I am sorry, Dean," he whispered, refusing to meet Dean's gaze due to the stinging of tears behind his eyes. He knows that what he feels for Dean is stronger than what he feels to Sam. He knows that he is content with being a brother to Sam but he isn't with Dean. He wants to be something more. Human emotions are too confusing.

"Cas," Dean said, his voice wavering a bit. "You're my brother, Cas, please don't leave. Not again." This almost made him stay; just almost. But he knew he had to do what was best for the Winchesters, for Dean. And again Dean referred to Castiel as a brother and something small snapped in him.

"Maybe I don't want to be your brother…" He said this so quietly he wasn't sure if Dean heard him. 'I want to be more than that,' he thinks.

"What?"

"I said, 'Maybe I don't want to be your brother', Dean," he said louder and walked out of the door of the room. He didn't bother looking back to see if Dean was behind him or not, he just walked through the hall and to the main entrance and out the door, knowing with an aching heart that he can't come back anymore. He can't see Dean anymore.

* * *

**Thank you for reading! Comments? Anyway, I'll update soon!**

_**Find my story on AO3 too! : /works/1021298**_


	2. Chapter 2

Notes: _**This chapter is more towards Dean's POV so don't get confused! Sorry it took a while. I have a lot of homework. Well, I hope you enjoy(:**_

* * *

_ "Maybe I don't want to be your brother, Dean." _

Those words rang inside Dean's head as he stood in the same spot long after Castiel walked out of the door. _You're either staying or you're leaving – for good." _Dean didn't want Cas to leave, let alone stay away forever. He only said that in hopes that his words would make Castiel stay. Then again, he also thought it'd help make Sam stay instead of going with Ruby, but it didn't work then either.

The former angel came back just to leave again. Every time Cas leaves, it breaks Dean a little. You see, this is _exactly _why Dean tries not to get attached to people outside of family. _'But Cas _is _family,'_ Dean tells himself.

_"Maybe I don't want to be your brother, Dean." _What the hell did that even mean? Did Dean do something wrong or did Cas just not think of him and Sam as family? Is that why he betrayed them? The thought made bile rise to his throat. No, that can't be true. If it were then why would Castiel have died for them –for _Dean_?

What Dean desperately wanted to do was to get into his Impala and fine Castiel so he can be where he belongs: with him and Sam. He just can't bring himself to move, knowing that the ex-angel didn't want to be here.

Sometime between then and now, Dean has sunk to his knees. He doesn't know when, though. He rubbed his tired face and felt wetness. When did he start crying? Why did Cas' leaving hurt so much? He was too busy in his thoughts to even realize that Gabriel was now standing in the room looking at him sadly. When Dean finally looked up, Gabriel left.

**X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X**

A couple hours later, Dean went from the floor to his bed. He didn't know what to do. He was thinking about calling Garth to see if he has a case he can work on but thought better of it since he knows Sam wouldn't appreciate him going alone. He ended up deciding that he'll call for an easier case. Just as he was about to call him up, he got a call from a number that he didn't know.

"Hello?" he answered cautiously.

"Hello, Dean," answered the person on the other line. His voice was deep and gravely and Dean knew who it must be.

"Cas?"

"Yes, Dean. I called to tell you that I have found a person to stay with so you don't have to worry." Did he somehow _know_ he was worrying? "Well, actually she found me."

"Who are you staying with, Cas?" When he didn't answer, Dean suddenly became irate. "Dammit, Castiel! Who are you staying with? This 'person' might not _be _a person!"

"Dean, it's fine," Castiel finally said. "I trust her."

"If you trust her so much then what's her name?"

"The name's Meg," came a familiar voice. "Hiya, Dean-o. Good to talk to you again."

This can't be right. "Meg died a few weeks ago, thank God- uh, Crowley- for that. I should really send him a fruit basket for that. Maybe even some flowers."

"Aw, Dean, that hurt," she replied sarcastically. "And I don't know how I'm alive either- not that I'm complaining. But anyway, Clarence is going to stay with me since he's got nowhere else to go. And you do need to worry 'cause I'm gunna take _great_ care of him." He heard he chuckle a little. "You know something, Dean-o? Clarence is cute when he blushed like that. Oh, he says bye, by the way." And before Dean could say anything she hung up.

He groaned. Dean really needs to get his mind off things so he decided to call Garth now. It only rings three times before Garth picks up. "Hey, Dean," he answers in his usual happy voice.

"Hey, Garth. So, are there any hunts I can do? Sammy's sick so if you want you can come with." He never thought that he'd free willingly ask Garth to hunt with him, but what choice does he have?

"Yes and no," he replies. "Yes I got a hunt for you; no I can't come with, sorry."

"Sam's gunna have a bitch fit if I go alone." Dean could see it now. Sam freaking out that Dean went alone then ignoring him for a while.

"I never said anything about you going alone," he told Dean. "I have someone that can go with you. They're very experienced."

"Awesome," Dean says. "So tell me about this hunt."

"Right, so I believe you dealt with this before. There's a series of abductions going on down in Arizona and there are many people saying that it's aliens." Dean groaned. Not again.

"Yeah, I know what we're dealing with. So where do I meet your friend?" Dean asks over the phone.

"Meet her at the Biggerson's down in town in like twenty minutes. You're gunna be needing to drive 'cause she'd get lost trying to get there." Garth laughed. "Anyway, I gotta go. Later." Dean hung up his phone and put it on the bedside table. He heard his bedroom door open and he saw his little brother on the other side of it.

"Hey. So I heard Cas woke up earlier," Sam said as he looked around. "Where is he?"

"How the hell would I know?" Dean answers bitterly.

Sam coughed. "Well he was in here."

"Yeah, _was. _He left,_ again,_ 'cause he doesn't care."

"What doesn't he care about?" Sam asked cautiously.

"Us," Dean snapped. "Before he left he said that he didn't want to be our brother anymore. All I know now is that he's with Meg." Dean shook his head. "I can't believe he thinks that we're _that_ bad that he's rather stay with a demon. A_ demon_, Sam!"

"Look, I don't understand this as much as you because we are his family-"

"-Obviously not," Dean interrupted.

"Well are you sure you heard him right?"

"Sam, I'm sure I wouldn't hear that wrong." Dean shook his head. "I just don't understand why…"

"There's a few reasons, actually," Gabriel said from behind Sam.

"Care to say them?"

"He thinks that because he's a human you mutton-heads don't need him anymore. What was it he said you called him? 'A baby in a trench coat'?"

"Come _on!_ That was _years _ago! He can't be upset about that still." Could he?

Gabriel ignored the comment and continued. "Also there's the fact that he thinks that he'd be a burden on you since you already have Gigantor over he to worry about." Dean scowls at him.

"How do you even know all of this?"

"He said it before he left. Don't you ever listen?" Gabriel rolled his eyes. "I can't believe he managed to last this long without killing you." Dean rolled his eyes now.

"Well, I guess that explains why he left but what about the brother thing?" Sam asks the archangel.

Gabriel looks at Dean and says, "I have some theories." He didn't continue.

"Care to elaborate some more?" Dean snaps.

"He didn't tell you for a reason so it's not my place to discuss them with you."

"Okay, well can you bring him back here? Let him know that he isn't a burden and that he can stay as long as he wants?" The taller Winchester asks.

He sighs over dramatically. "No matter _how_ much I want to so you two would stop your complaining, I can't."

"And why the hell not?" Dean yells.

"Because he seems to be happy with this demon of his." Dean was going to say something back but then his phone rings.

"Hello," he answers, not bothering to check the caller ID.

"Dean, where the hell are you?" Comes Garth's voice on the other line. "You were supposed to be at Biggerson's like twenty minutes ago, man."

"Shit, sorry man. I got caught up in something. I'll be there in ten." Dean hung up his phone and saw Sam looking at him. "I gotta go."

"Where are you going?" The younger Winchester asks.

"On a hunt with Garth's hunter friend or something in Arizona," Dean calls out from behind him as he walks out of the door.

**X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X **

It only took Dean five minutes to get to Biggerson's so, even though he's already late, he decides to use his last five minutes for a piece of pie. He orders a cherry pie and sits down at a booth. Less than two minutes later, the waitress brings him the pie, looks at him, and then sits across from him.

"You're looking a little low," she states plainly. "Is there anything wrong?" She has long, wavy, dark brown hair and brown eyes. She was beautiful but Dean doesn't feel like talking to anyone. He decides to tell her the outright plain truth, hoping she will go away thinking he's crazy like the people at that one mental hospital thought.

"Well, uh," he looks at her name tag, "Clarissa-"

"Clare," she corrects.

"Right, well nothing really out of the ordinary. You know, me and my brother trying to save the world- again- which is causing him to be fatally sick. Then my best friend, who is pretty much a brother to me, comes back, just to leave saying that he doesn't want to be my brother anymore and goes and stays with a demon. Seriously, am I _that _bad that so much of my family leaves me for demons?" Dean is never this open, even when he's drunk. And to his surprise, Clare is still there looking at him so understandingly.

Then she smiles. "So _you're_ Dean Winchester? You know, most hunters want to kill you because they still hold a grudge against you and your brother for starting the apocalypse. But me; I'm one of the ones who think they should thank you for stopping it." Dean stares at her dumbfounded.

"And why is that?" He finally asks.

"Well I guess I know how you feel, in a lesser scale of course." She shakes he head a little. "I had a sister once. Lillian and I were really close, kinda like you and Sam. I'd have done _anything_ for her. But she was also one of Azazel's 'experiments' and I guess she wasn't strong enough." Dean saw tears gathering in her eyes and felt bad for asking why. Still, she continued.

"She was the sweetest girl there could ever be, that is until she discovered her 'power' or whatever the hell you call it. It wasn't really a power but more like a curse. Any living thing with a heartbeat she touched just died. That's how her girlfriend died. Then one night that bitch Azazel took her and-" her voice broke and tears stared to come down her face now. "And I tried looking for her but I couldn't find her. Then I heard about Sam and I knew I wasn't going to be able to find her." Dean was speechless as she wiped the tears from face. She took a few deep breaths. "And that's how I became a hunter; I went looking for Azazel. It wasn't until a few weeks later until I learned he already died but I couldn't quit the life now, knowing that people out there are dying."

"I'm sorry about your sister," Dean says seriously. "But- now don't take this the wrong way- but if she _did_ live then all the shit with the apocalypse would have been on your shoulders somehow. Then you'd have to deal with all this shit with angels."

"How would you know that?" She asks him.

"Because that's what happened with Sammy and me."

"Right, but didn't the shit start hitting the fan when you sold your soul? And all that crap with the first seal, you know? Maybe if Lilly did live, nothing would have changed. You may have still sold your soul to save Sam and the story may have played out the same way with just an extra character." She had a point. "Beside," Clare says after a while, "if things _did_ change that means you'd have never met your two best friends."

"My _two_ best friends?" Dean repeats. He of course knows of Cas but who is the other one?

"Yeah, and soon to be three," she states with a smile. Dean just stares at her with a clueless expression then C;are sighs. "Best friend number one: Castiel: the Angel of The Lord who went against Heaven for the Winchesters. Best friend number two: Charlie Bradbury: the hacker and LARPer who helped you with those Leviathans before she even knew you and introduced you to LARPing all while becoming you very own sister."

"How the hell do you know about them?"

"Well, Charlie and I used to date but now we are best friends. She told me about Castiel saying something about reading about him in a book?"

"Don't _ever_ read those. _Please._" Dean tells her.

She smiles and nods. "Anyways, soon to be best friend number three," she points to herself with both of her thumb, "this gal: Clarissa- Clare- Thompson: the super amazing female hunter with a crazy part of her life somewhat similar to a crazy part of yours." Dean chuckles a bit and shakes his head.

"Okay, we can discuss more in the car on the way to Arizona," he tells her as he gets up from his seat. He pays for the pie and heads to the Impala. Clare walks right behind him then stops in he tracks.

"Holy shit," Clare breaths out. "This," she says pointing at the black car in front of her, "this is a beauty! _Way _better than my piece of crap 1996 Chevy Silverado."

"You don't seriously drive that do you?"

"Shut up. It's the only car I can afford."

Dean laughs. "Since you so far seem to be a perfect person so far, when we get back from this hunt, I'll let you have one of the many awesome cars at my bunker," he tells her.

"Are you fucking serious? 'Cause I swear if you're lying I will murder you!" Clare exclaims. Dean chuckles.

"That's if you still prove to be an awesome person."

"Deal," she says as she gets into the passenger side and Dean in the driver's.

**X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X **

The fairy hunt was easy. It only took about three or four days. It wasn't until Garth called saying that there was a witch issue a couple towns away from the fairies.

"Come on, Garth! Can't you find someone else to deal with this? I fucking _hate _witches!" Dean yelled into the phone.

"Sorry, man. It's urgent and you two are the closest ones there," Garth replied.

"Fan-fucking-tastic," Dean mumbled. "Fine, we'll take care of it." Dean hung up the phone and set it on the table. "We got witches to deal with before heading back," he tells Clare.

"Seriously, that means I have to wait _longer _for the car?" She asks with a dramatic, winey tone.

"It's the final test, my friend: how well can you deal with witches? Now let's pack are bags and head out. The sooner we leave, the sooner we're done, the sooner we can go home and get your car." The grab their bags and put them in the trunk of the car. As soon as Dean and Clare get in the car, Dean's phone rings. Assuming it was Garth, he answers it.

"Garth, _please_ tell me you're calling to say you found someone else to deal with them so me and Clare can go home. I want my room back, man."

"Dean?" Answers a low voice, which obviously isn't Garth's.

"Cas?" It was more of a statement than a question. Dean looks over at Clare and her eyes lit up.

"Oh, let me talk to him!" She begs.

"Dean, who is that?" Castiel asks on the other line.

"That's just Clare. She's my new hunting partner while Sammy's sick. I gotta tell you; never underestimate this female hunter. Not only can she hunt but she has good taste in cars and she's hilarious." Dean can see Clare beaming from beside him. "We were just leaving to hunt down some witches and I appreciate this delay so what's up?"

"Can I _pleeeaaasee _talk to him too?" Clare begs. Dean rolls his eyes.

"Fine. Hey, Cas, you're on speaker. This little bugger wants to talk to you for reasons unknown."

"Hi, Castiel!" She says with a smile.

"Hello, Clare," Cas replies back.

"Woah, nice voice, not at all what I expected. Well, it's nice to speak to the only one of Dean's best friends that I don't know. His other best friend, Charlie, is also a great person; of course I've known her for a long time. And Dean's third best friend I have to say is the best."

"Who is that?" He asks. Dean could just see him with his head tilted to the side.

"Me, duh! But I think I'm the best since I'm like him but as a chick." She shakes her head. "Well, I heard some good and bad things about you. Good: you saved Dean from Hell. Bad: you came a little late. Good: You decide to go against Heaven for the Winchesters. Bad: you still let Sam break the last seal. Good: you help them with the apocalypse. Bad: you left Dean for a year. Good: You brought Sam back from Hell. Bad: you lied to them _a lot_, broke Sam's head, and opened Purgatory causing Leviathans to run loose. Good: you help Sam. Bad: you stay in Purgatory making Dean think he failed you. Good: you come back to them. Bad: you left Dean after nearly _killing_ him just for some stone that no one but one person can read. Good: you gave up the rock and your Grace for him and Sam. And the worst thing on the list: you abandon him, once again, for a demon like his dad did, like his brother did."

"Okay, that's enough Clare," Dean sternly tells Clare.

"How do you know all that?" Castiel asks her, clearly ignoring Dean's comment.

"Well, like I said, Dean and I are similar in many ways so he told me." Dean takes the phone and puts it off speaker and gets out of the car.

****"I'm sorry about that, Cas. She's just so open-minded. Just don't hate her or me for that matter."

"Dean, there is nothing that could make me hate you," he tells Dean and Dean lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding. "But I do wonder; how is it that you open up to Clare so easily when you can barely tell me or Sam anything. You've known Sam your whole life, me for five years, and you've only known her for a week." When Dean didn't answer right away, he continued. "Is she your girlfriend?" He asked and Dean could _swear _he could hear disappointment in his voice.

"At least she's not a fucking _demon_, Cas!" Dean scoffed. "But no, she's not my girlfriend, not that it's even any of your business. I don't even see why it matters. She's a nice girl and she's been though a lot like I have. And because of that, I _know_ she won't leave for some demon bitch like you and Sam."

"Dean! You've only known her for a short time, how can you even be so sure?"

"Because, Yellow Eyes ruined her life like he ruined mine. Both of our little siblings were part demon. Both of them died. The difference was that she was too young to remember the fire and she didn't sell her soul for her sister." Dean sighed, his anger suddenly leaving him. "Look, Cas, we gotta go. Witches are killing people. I'll, uh, call you before we leave."

"Okay, Dean. And I'm sorry for getting angry at you," Castiel tells him. "I have to get used to controlling my anger and other emotions still."

Dean laughs a little. "Yeah, I guess so. But I really do gotta go. I wanna kill these bitches so I can get home. I'll call you in a few days, Cas."

"Goodbye, Dean," Cas says then he hangs up. Dean heads back to the car and gets in.

"Do anything like that again and you will never get a car from me," Dean tells Clare. "Now, are you ready to kill some witches?"

**X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X**

It didn't take long to figure out that the witch was the motel manager, Brittany. It was now the night that they were going to put an end to her witchcraft. Dean and Clare made their way to Brittany's room. She was softly chanting something in front of an altar. Dean saw that there was a picture and he moved closer so that he could see who it was. He gasped. It was… him. The witch turned around and saw the two intruders.

"Well, well, if it isn't Mr. Dean Winchester and Miss Clarissa Thompson. I've been expecting you two," she tells them. Dean raises his gun up at her and the hunter beside him does the same. "Put your guns down you two." They, of course, didn't comply. That is, until their guns started to heat up and burn their hands. "Good." She came up to Dean and pulled out a hair.

"What the hell?"

"I need this," she said holding up the hair. She put it in a bowl that was on the altar and turned to face them again. "I don't want you two interrupting me so please, take a seat." She must be a strong witch because she was able to make them fall to the ground and they were stuck like that. The witch began to chant again. It wasn't long until Dean started to feel unbearable pain.

"What are you doing to him?" He heard Clare yell.

"Don't worry, I'm not killing him. It's going to be much worse for him." She laughed cynically and started to finish up the chant. Dean couldn't handle much more of this so he began to pray.

'_Gabe, help me out, man. There's a witch and I think she's killing me.'_

Just as she finished up Gabriel came. "What the hell, man. I was busy." He looked over at Dean. "Oh." He turned and saw the witch trying to run but he easily killed her which let Dean and Clare free.

Clare looked at Gabriel, then to Dean, and back to the archangel. "Dude, Dean's _hot _now!" Gabriel laughed loudly.

"What the hell is so funny?" Dean asked in a voice that was way too high to be his. "What the hell is wrong with my voice?" He looked at his body now. "Why the _hell _do I have boobs?" Gabe and Clare began laughing again. "Tell me what the fuck is going on!"

"Dude," Clare said. "The witch made you a chick."

"How is this funny?"

"Because you're a chick and not a guy anymore?" Gabriel says.

"At least you're a hot chick," Clare states.

"Whatever. Gabe, just take us and the Impala home. I need some sleep and maybe this will be better when I wake up." The archangel sighed and walked up and placed a hand on them and brought them back to the bunker. Dean fell right on his bed and passed out.


	3. Chapter 3

**Ugh! I am soo sorry this took FOREVER! This chapter is like 2-3 weeks late. I've just been having soo much homework lately and I had to write a short story for English and oh my God I'm just done with this homework crap. Thankfully its Thanksgiving break now so I'm gunna post another chapter BEFORE Sunday and most likely before Saturday as a 'Sorry I neglected the story' chapter. Well, I hope you like this chapter.**

* * *

When he woke up, Dean felt like he was hit by a train. His vision was blurry, but by how the bed felt, he knew he was at the bunker in his room. He vaguely remembers coming back here. He remembers pain. A lot of pain. He remembers Gabriel killing the witch. He remembers Clare and the archangel laughing at something. But what was it? He couldn't remember.

Dean groaned in pain as he tried to sit up. Wait… Either Clare was still here and groaned in pain the same time he did or his voice went up a few octaves. And then he remembered; he's a girl now. This made him hate witches a lot more than he used to. He managed to ignore most of the pain as he sat up finally. He felt people crowd around him.

Dean distinctly saw his brother through his blurry eyes because how can you not see him? The dude's a giant. He then saw red hair and knew it was Charlie and beside her he saw a girl with long brown hair and guessed it was Clare. He gestured for some water, hoping they knew what he meant. Thankfully Sam did and brought him a glass. Dean gratefully drank it down.

"Uh, would you guys mind backing up?" He managed to ask. They all took a few steps back. He patted his pockets for his phone but couldn't find it. "Anyone know where my phone is?" Sam left the room to get it and Dean saw Clare and Charlie whispering and giggling. "What are you to gossiping about?" He asks them.

"We were just saying that you're hot as a chick," Clare states. Dean blushed a little.

"Yeah, well don't get used to it. We're gunna find a way to get me back to a dude," Dean tells them. "But for now I need some aspirin because I feel like I was hit by a train."

"Hey, Sam!" Charlie yelled. "Bring some aspirin on your way back!"

"God damn, Charlie! Don't shout. My head is pounding." Sam soon came back with more water, the pills, and Dean's cell phone. He swallowed the pills, ignoring the pain in his throat, and held out his hand for his phone.

"Who do you wanna call anyway?" Sam asked without giving him his phone.

"I promised Cas that I'd call him after the hunt so I'm gunna call him." Dean still had his hand out but Sam didn't give it to him. "Damn it, Sam, give me my fucking phone!"

"I think it'd be better if I call him so he isn't too overwhelmed about you, you know, being a girl. Who knows, he might think it's some sick prank that some girl was trying to pull," Sam told him. Dean sighed in defeat because he knew Sam was right.

"Fine."

**X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X**

Cas, in the simplest way of saying it, was jealous. This new emotion came to him once he found out about Dean's new hunting partner. He was jealous that this _Clare _was spending so much time with Dean. Jealous that Dean had opened up to her so easily when he couldn't even open up to him or his own brother. Like, seriously, Dean's only known Clare for a week tops and he's known Cas for _years_. So far Castiel didn't like human emotions as much as he thought he would.

His thoughts were broken by the ringing of his cell phone. _Dean_, he thought because he's supposed to call after his hunt. The former angel quickly got up and grabbed his phone off the table and answered it.

"Hello," he answered.

"Uh, hey, Cas. It's nice to hear you." This wasn't Dean like he thought it would be. It was Sam.

"Sam? Is Dean alright? Did he get hurt?" Why would Sam be calling off of Dean's phone?

"Uh, right, about that." Castiel felt like his heart, stomach, and all of his other internal organs dropped through the floor. What happened to Dean? Did he die?

"Sam, what happened?" He asked after the Winchester didn't continue.

"Nothing to worry about, Cas. He's healthy and fine... for the most part." He could tell that Sam wasn't telling him everything. "It's just that the, uh, witch kinda messed him up." Sam's words hardly helped.

"What does that mean, Sam?"

"Dean wants to talk to you," Sam said, ignoring Castiel's question. "But I think it would be better if you, uh, see what happened for yourself." Castiel heard a female yelling in the background telling Sam to give her the phone. "I'll just send Gabriel to get you." There was another pause and more yelling in the background. "Oh, and Dean says that if you bring Meg with then he won't hesitate to stab her in the brain and, uh, demand a fruit basket and flowers from Crowley? I don't know what he means but he says that you'd know." Castiel huffed a laugh in response. "Okay, so Gabe will be there in a minute or whatever. See you soon, Cas." Then he hung up.

Castiel was still freaking out. What happened to Dean? Why did Sam have to call? Why wouldn't he let Dean talk to him? About a minute and a half later Gabriel showed up.

"Hey there, lil' bro!" He greeted.

"Hello, Gabriel," Castiel replied. "May I ask what happened to Dean?" For some reason this made Gabriel burst into laughter.

"You'll see soon, Cassie. But before we leave I have to say something." Gabriel looked at Cas with pleading eyes. "For the love of _everything_, don't _ever_ leave again. I don't think I can last much longer with Dean and his bitchiness. 'Bring Cas back.' 'Convince Cas to come back.' 'Save me, Gabriel, I think I'm dying.'" Gabriel mocked. "And it's probably only going to get worse since he's kind of actually a bitch." Before Castiel could ask what he meant, they were in the bunker, in Dean's room. "Here we are, lil' bro."

Castiel first noticed that there was a beautiful young woman in Dean's bed. She had long wavy blond hair and pink, full lips. She also had the most beautiful green eyes he had ever seen. Wait… Cas _knows _those eyes. Those are _Dean's_ eyes. Castiel barely noticed that they all, Sam, the blond (Dean?), a red head and a girl with brown hair, greeted him.

"Uh, hello, Sam and… Dean?"

"Damn," Dean said. His voice, Castiel noticed, is about an octave higher. This is something he'll have to get used to. "How did you know so easily? Do I look this girly normally?"

"No, Dean. I knew because of your eyes. No one has eyes quite like yours. Then again, they do say that eyes are the key to the soul of a person and no one has a soul like yours." Castiel just looked at Dean and Dean was blushing. Then something now made sense to Cas. He laughed a little.

"What are you laughing about?" Sam asked him.

"I finally now understand Gabriel's joke," Castiel said with a smile. "It was rude but funny." From beside him Gabriel burst into laughter.

"What was the joke?" The brunette and red head simultaneously asked.

"It is not of import," Cas told them.

"Fine," the red head huffed. "Well, I'll introduce myself then. I'm Charlie. It's really great to finally meet you." She looks over to Dean. "I knew he was dreamy." She winked at the blond.

"Don't mind her," Dean tells him. "She read Chuck's books."

"Yep! Up till Sam jumped into the pit."

"Wait. Chuck stopped publishing them way before then," Sam says.

"Some girl started to get his unpublished writings published. Her name was Becky I think." Dean laughed and Sam choked on water. "Do you know her?" Charlie asked with her eyebrows raised.

"Yeah," Dean says with a laugh. "She's Sammy's ex-wife." Everyone, Cas, Charlie, Clare, and Gabriel looked at Sam.

"You were _married_?" They all ask in disbelief.

"I was _drugged_!" Sam rubbed his face with his hands. "Let's just forget about it, okay?" Dean gave a small laugh in agreement.

"So, Cas," he starts, "I was kinda hopin' you'd bring Meg so I could finally gank that bitch." Castiel really had to get used to Dean sounding like this.

"I don't think she likes you much either," Cas tells him. "She had once said something about you being a monster with green eyes. I didn't understand what she meant."

"Uh, did she say 'a greened eyed monster'?" Clare asks. It took Castiel all he got not to roll his eyes at her. His jealousy made him really hate her. He just nodded. "Calling someone a green eyed monster is just another way of saying that person is jealous."

"I don't understand. Why would the color of someone's eyes matter?"

"It doesn't, Cas," Sam chimes in. "It's just a phrase that came from Shakespeare or something."

"I see," Castiel says. "But why would she think Dean would be jealous?" Is it possible that Dean was jealous of Meg just as Cas was jealous of Clare? The former angel quickly pushed those thoughts back so that he wouldn't get his hopes up.

"I'm not jealous!" Dean yells, making everyone- aside from Gabriel- flinch.

"Yeah, sure you're not," the archangel says with a smirk.

"I just don't trust demons," Dean deadpans. "Not that anyone can blame me," he mumbles afterwards. Everyone was quiet for a while until Dean looks down at his stomach. "I'm hungry."

"I could go out to get food," Castiel tells them.

"Yeah, how? You can't drive, so what? Are you gunna walk?" Dean questioned.

"No, I know how to drive," Cas tells him. "Meg taught me during my time with her." Something in Dean's green eyes change a little for some reason. Then he slowly got up and walked wobbly towards Castiel. This is strange, Cas noticed. Dean is now two or three inches shorter than him. The blond gave the former angel the keys to the Impala and Cas stared at him in disbelief.

"Don't ruin her," he said. "Later on you're getting proper driving lessons from me." Cas smiled at this and walked out to get the food.

**X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X**

"Dude," Sam said once Castiel left. "What the hell?"

"What?" Dean asked.

"You barely trust me to drive the car but you let Cas drive it with hardly any practice?" Sam complains. In all honesty, Dean had no idea why he did it.

"I, uh, thought it was the best way to keep him from leaving again?" Dean guesses because he doesn't even know himself. "'Sides, you could get your own car now. I'm sure the Men of Letters have a few extra." Speaking of, after Clare picks one he should let Cas have one since he'd be staying with them now. It might also work for bribing. But Dean didn't want to have to bribe Castiel to stay; he wants him to stay because the former angel wanted too.

Charlie came up to Sam and whispered something in his ear and made him smile and look at Dean. "I so knew it," he replied to her.

"What?" Dean asked but they just chuckled. "Seriously, what did you say?" They just continued to laugh.

"What's so funny?" Castiel said as he suddenly came into the room. Obviously his sneaking up hasn't changed since he became human because everyone in the room jumped a bit. "I apologize for startling you. May I know what you were laughing at?" Cas asked while looking at Dean.

Dean held up his hands defensively. "Hey, don't look at me; I don't even know what they're laughing at." Castile shrugged and brought the bag of food to Dean. The first thing he saw when he opened the take out bag was pie. He looked up at Cas with a blissful expression. "You bought pie?"

"Yes. You always say that you want pie so I decided to bring you some." Castiel furrowed his eyebrows. "I hope apple is okay."

"Dude, Cas, apple is the best kind of pie, so yeah, it's okay." On the other side of the room the girls and Sam laughed. "Seriously, what the hell is so God damned funny to you guys?" Dean asked irritated. He turned back to Castiel. "You know, sometimes you're better that Sam," he pointed out.

"Shut up, jerk!" Sam told him.

"Make me, bitch," Dean retorted.

"Technically you're the bitch, Dean," Sam pointed out with a smirk.

"If I weren't so damn hungry, I'd kick your ass."

"Yeah blame it on the hunger."

"Me and Clare will be right back. We gotta get stuff from the car," Charlie said as they walked out the door giggling a little.

"Hurry up! When you get back you and Cas gotta pick out a car!" Dean yelled out to them.

"Me?" Castiel asked in a surprised tone.

"Well, yeah, I figure since you're staying here now you might need your own car 'cause you ain't driving Baby," Dean told him.

"Dean, thank you, but I can't."

"If this is the crap about you thinking that you're a burden then save it. Look at Sammy, he's sick and barely can do shit anymore-"

"Hey!" Same interrupted.

"-and I ain't kicking him out. And now, with me being a chick, I probably can't fight as good and Sammy ain't kicking me out. So who cares if you're human? You were before, back before we stopped the apocalypse, and we didn't kick you out then, so why would we now?" Castiel remained silent for a couple moments.

"Okay, Dean," he finally said. "If you want me to stay then I'll be happy to." Castiel smiled at Dean, and _wow _his eyes were blue. Like a dark, yet bright blue. Dean shook his head trying to get the random thought out of his head. He finally noticed something.

"Cas, where's your coat?"

"Meg thought that since I am human now that it would be best that I get new clothing," Castiel replied. Before Dean could reply, Charlie and Clare came in with a bunch of bags in their hands.

"What? Are you two moving in now?" He asked them.

"No, these are for you," Clare replied. "Your boy clothes won't fit so we are giving you clothes from us that we think you'll fit into." Clare was grinning now. "And since we're going to a club tonight, we are going to give you a small make over."

"Yeah, not gunna happen," the blond told them. "I don't wanna be a painted whore." _Again,_ he added silently.

"Okay, how about if you let me do your hair and make-up every day that you are a girl then you don't have to give me a car." Dean knew that was a stupid deal. He knows that he'd rather give her a car but her God damn puppy eyes were just as bad as Sam's and he gave in.

"Fine," he finally said, not sounding happy at the least. "But now dudes are gunna be hitting on me the whole time and it will be annoying," he complained.

"Bring Cas," Charlie suggested. "Then they'll think you're with someone and leave you alone most likely." Dean shrugged.

"What do ya say, Cas? You could wear something of mine since Sammy's clothes would obviously be too big and you can make sure dudes don't bother me too much."

"Of course, Dean." The hunter goes to his closet and grabs a pair of pants, and undershirt and a blue plaid button up and hands them to the former angel.

"You can get dressed in the bathroom." Once Cas left- and Sam- Clare and Charlie began their mission. This is probably going to be a long night for Dean.

**X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X**

Castiel noticed that Dean's clothes, other than being a little bit loose, fit perfectly. He combed his hair and walked out of the bathroom and waited for Dean and the others to be ready.

Cas wishes that he said that he didn't want to go. Not because he didn't _want _to go, but because the girls made Dean look more beautiful than before, which is hard to do considering that Dean is the most beautiful person Castiel has met, as a male or female. It was probably going to be torture to the fallen angel to be by the one person that he loves more than anyone or anything for the whole night and just feel a strong _want_ but not being able to do anything about it.

Dean's blond hair was straight now, not wavy, and he was wearing a red plaid shirt that was tied right above his belly button, light blue shorts, and a pair of black converse. The girls put some eyeliner and mascara on him, as well as some eye shadow and glitter on his eyes.

"She looks gorgeous doesn't she, Cas?" Clare asks as she comes into the room. Castiel just swallows thickly and nods.

"Yes," he simply says and Dean blushed more which made his green eyes show better.

"And, Cas, you look great too, right, Dean?" Charlie questions from beside Dean.

"Uh, yeah, you do, Cas," Dean tells him and Castiel can feel his own face heating up. From beside Dean, Clare and Charlie are grinning.

"Well, let's get this show on the road, shall we?"

* * *

**So? How was it for being 2-3 weeks late? Comments? Suggestions?**


	4. Chapter 4

**Here it is! Chapter 4!**

* * *

Dean's pretty impressed with Castiel on how well he keeps random guys away from him. Anytime a creepy dude tried bothering Dean Cas gave him the 'I'm an Angel of the Lord and I will smite you if you don't get away' look and they just hurried away. It's actually quite amusing to watch since Cas is really harmless. Well, kind of. He probably can still kick someone's ass pretty good if you got him pissed.

The night was going good, Charlie and Clare were off doing who knows what at the other end of the bar and the hunter and fallen angel were having a good time having drinks and talking about random stories. Well, it _was_ good until Dean saw some unwanted company when he was coming back from the bathroom. There, standing by Castiel, was that blond bitch, Meg. Well, tonight must be the night that she dies for good.

Dean was walking towards the two of them but stopped. He can't just _stab_ Meg in the middle of a crowded bar. That would definitely not end well for him. He would probably have to go to jail for murder and that's something he can't deal with now. What the hell, he'll just wing it somehow.

He continued to walk and when he got by them he turned to face Meg and plastered on a fake smile. "Meg, what a surprise to see you here," Dean said. The demon's jaw drop but then she closes it and smirks.

"Wow, Clarence, you really weren't joking. Dean-o actually _is_ a girl." She looked at Dean now. "How does it feel to be the type a person you're always perving on? Did someone perv on you yet or did you cower behind Clarence the whole time?"

_Screw it_, Dean thought as he took the demon blade out of his back pocket. Right before it made contact with her skin, a strong hand gripped his wrist and stopped him. He turned around and gave Castiel an irritable look.

"Aw, Clarence, you don't have to protect me from her, she's practically a harmless kitten." Dean felt anger boil up in him and he was down to one choice left to get rid of this black eyed bitch. He'd just have to call in another black eyed bitch.

"Excuse me for a bit," he said with a tight smile. Dean turned and headed for the door. He faintly heard Castiel calling out to him but he ignored that and kept walking. When he got in the middle of the parking lot he stopped.

"Crowley, get your demonic ass over here!" He yelled. "I have a, uh, deal to make with you!" Dean looked around for the King of Hell but he wasn't here. "Come on, Crowley!"

"Who are you and what do you want? I'm quite busy right now." Dean faced the direction of the voice and saw Crowley.

"I'm the one who most likely hates you most and I want you to freakin' kill Meg and get it right this time," the hunter replied. "She's inside the bar."

"What could Meg have possibly done to some random girl that would make her call me, the King if Hell, just to kill her?" He disappeared but not for long. He came back about thirty seconds later with a smirk on his face. "Ah, so she's flirting with Castiel so that means you must be Squirrel. So what? It wasn't working out between you and feathers so you decided to become a girl and now you're jealous because a demon is flirting with your boyfriend? What? You can't kill her yourself so you're making another demon deal?"

"I'm not jealous and me and Cas were never together. I just hate Meg 'cause she's been a pain in my ass for years now," Dean tells him.

"Okay, so I kill her. Now the question is, what do you give to me?"

"What? Meg isn't enough?"

"No, because that is my favor for you, now what do I get?" He asks again. Dean said the first thing that came to his mind.

"We'll stop the trials." Crowley raised an eyebrow.

"Is that so?" Dean just nodded and Crowley smirked. "Very well; I'll make this deal an exception so you don't have to seal it with a kiss, but if you still continue with the trials then I will kill poor little Castiel. Got that?" He didn't wait for an answer. He just left. Dean just stood there for a while before walking in back to Castiel. He saw that Cas was speaking to Charlie and Clare.

"So," Dean said nonchalantly when he reached his friends. "Where did demon bitch go?" Dean was trying not act suspicious about it.

"Cas said that Crowley found her and took her away," Clare answered.

Castiel looked up at him with hopeful eyes. "We must find her, Dean," he pleads.

"No, Cas," Dean said instantly. "What has she ever done for us?"

"She helped us find the crypt with the angel tablet," Castiel replies.

"Yeah and look where that got us," Dean snaps. "Me nearly beaten to death and you graceless." Castiel flinched at Dean's words but Dean was too angry to care much. "Besides what's the point in trying to find someone- a_ demon_- that's as good as dead by now?" He says after a while.

"There's still a chance that's she's alive, Dean!"

"No, Cas, there really isn't."

"How do you know that?" Castiel demands.

"'Cause I made sure of it!" _Shit!_ Dean did _not _mean to say that. Castiel's eyes looked hurt now.

"You told Crowley where she was? Why, Dean?"

"Because, if I learned anything, and I mean _anything_, these past few years, it's to _never_ trust a demon," the hunter tells him.

"But, Dean," Cas tries to plead. "She was there for me when nobody else was. Don't you think that makes her worth saving?" This made Dean's anger double- no, triple.

"That's because _you_ left!" Dean snapped. "We were always there for you- _I_ was always there for you but you _always_ left! And you know what? I'm tired of my family always leaving me for demons. First my dad with his obsession with finding Yellow-eyes, then Sam with Ruby, then you did it twice, first with Crowley and then with Meg," Dean spat. "Am I really _that_ bad that my family will choose a _demon_ before me?" The three of them just stared at Dean, surprised from his outburst. Dean turned around and headed for the door when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He rolled his eyes and turned to face the person and saw that it was Charlie.

"Dean," she said softly but loud enough so he could hear her above the noise of the bar. "Where are you going?"

"Back to the bunker," he states.

"Dean, I know you're upset but you can't just leave 'cause the rest of us aren't ready to go," Charlie told him. "And if you leave how will the rest of get home?" Dean thought for a moment then took out his keys and hands them to her.

"I'll walk home then. Don't ruin her," he sternly tells her. He then turned around and walked outside. After about five minutes of walking his phone started to ring. He pulled it out and answered it without looking at the caller ID. "Hello?"

"Who is this?" Came a panicked voice on the other line. "And why do you have Dean's phone?"

"Woah, Kev, it's okay, it's me, Dean," he reassured him. "I got in some trouble with a witch and she did this weird gender swap spell. So what's up? Any luck on the tablet?" He asked before remembering that he has to stop the trials.

"Uh, right, the trials. Uh, no, I don't know anything new except Crowley came and said you're not doing the trials anymore? I wasn't gunna believe him but he seems pretty sure about it so I decided to make sure and also to tell you that I need somewhere else to stay since he knows where I am."

"Yeah, Kev, he's right. These trials are making Sam sick and I can't risk it." It wasn't a complete lie; Sam was getting sick and Gabriel said it was fatal but it was also not the real truth. "And as for you staying somewhere, you can stay at the bunker with me and Sam," Dean tells the prophet. "And Cas," he adds quickly.

"Cas is back?" Kevin questions. "The last I heard he went M.I.A. with the angel tablet."

"Yeah, well, he's back and mojoless. I guess Naomi took his grace or some shit when she took to tablet from him." She was on the top of Dean's 'people he has to kill' list.

"So he's human. How is he handling it?"

"Hell if I'd know," Dean replies bitterly. "When he first became human a few weeks or so ago he just said he couldn't stay and left to stay with Meg. Then he came back earlier today 'cause Sam told him about the witch… and for some reason he thinks that…" Dean stopped as heard rustling in the bushes on the side of the road. _'Come on, Winchester, it's just the wind,' _he told himself. He cleared his throat. "Uh, he thinks that she was the only who…" Dean stopped in his tracks. There was definitely someone- or something- following him.

"Dean? What's wrong?" Kevin asked.

"Uh, I gotta go, man." He didn't wait for a reply as he hung up and put the phone in his pocket. He didn't have his supplies to fight back so he began to walk faster. The rustling sounded closer so he broke into a sprint. _'Thank God I convinced Clare and Charlie to let me wear converse instead of the heels,'_ he thought to himself.

The rustling sounded really close now so Dean pulled out his phone and called Sam. He answered after four rings. "Sam!" Dean nearly yelled.

"Dean? What's wrong?" Sam asked worriedly.

"Sammy there's something chasing after me and it's getting close. I don't know what it is but I have nothing to defend myself against it!" Dean rushed out. He glanced behind his shoulder and saw a shadow. "Whatever it is, it's huge!"

"Dean, what are you doing on your own? Where are the others?"

"Still at the bar. There was an argument between me and Cas so I decided that I'd walk home. How is any of this important?" He glanced behind himself again. "_Shit._ Sam, it's really close now. I think it's a… wendigo?"

"Dean where are you exactly? I'll send Gabe to get you!"

"I'm, uh," Dean tried hard to think about how far he was from the bar but it's not exactly an easy thing to do when being chased by a monster. "Uh, I- I don't know, Sammy," he stuttered. "Like two miles away from-" He cut off with a high pitched scream as the wendigo grabbed a hold of him. Dean accidentally dropped his phone but was still able to hear his brother franticly call his name. "I'm two miles away from the bar! Sammy! Help!" He yelled as loud as he could as the monster carried him into the woods.

**X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X**

"Dean? Dean!" Sam yelled as soon as his brother- sister?- screamed. He's never heard Dean being so scared, except when the hell hounds came. It must have to be something with being a girl. Sam continued to call his Dean's name.

"I'm two miles away from the bar! Sammy! Help!" Sam heard the screams go out into the distance. Sam started to cry a bit but he was too worried to care. He hung up his phone.

"Gabe!" He cried out. "Gabe I need your help, _please_!" Sam begged. He instantly heard the sound of wings.

"Sam, what happened? What's wrong?" The joking tone that's usually in Gabriel's voice isn't there anymore; it's just full of worry.

"Dean was walking home and- and a wendigo took him! We have to find him Gabe!" Sam was shaking badly

"Sam, you need to calm down, it won't do any good if you freak out badly." Sam took a few deep breaths. "Good. Now what would you do on a normal hunt?"

"Check out the scene of the crime," Sam answered quietly.

"Okay, where did Dean say he was?"

"He said that he was two miles from the bar. He was walking back here."

"He wasn't with the others?" Sam shook his head. "Okay, we'll try to keep it so they don't know. I don't need Cassie worrying too." Sam grimaced at the mention of Castiel because Dean said that he walked home because of Cas. "Sam, what is it?"

The taller man sighed. "It's nothing. Just that Dean said the reason he was walking back here was because him and Cas got in an argument back at the bar." Sam shook his head. "I won't hold it against him; it's just that I won't be able to talk to him much until we find Dean."

"Okay, well let's get to the spot where Dean was taken." Gabe placed a hand on Sam's shoulder and they were suddenly on the side of the road. About ten feet away Sam saw something on the ground. He jogged to it and saw it was Dean's cell. Well now they can't use the GPS to find him.

They barely started to look around when a familiar engine slowed down by them. "Sam? Gabriel? What are you two doing out here?" Charlie asked after she rolled he window down. The two boys glanced at each other.

"Okay…" Charlie slowly said. "But why this far out? Also, did you see Dean on your way? He said that he'd walk home." _'Crap, what do we say now?'_ Sam thought. He looked over to Gabriel hoping that he had another lie to tell them.

"Maybe Dean-o found a person to go home with once he left the bar," Gabriel suggested but it didn't help because now Castiel opened the car door and walked out.

"You're lying, Gabriel. What are you not telling us?" The former angel demanded. If people could _actually _'glare daggers' then Sam would have stabbed Castiel about 87 times since he walked out of the car. Cas looked at Sam now. "Sam, are you alright?"

"No," Sam said bitterly. "I'm not 'alright.'" Gabriel stared at him trying to make him shut up.

"Sam," Gabe said warningly.

"No, I think he should know," Sam insisted.

"Know what?" Cas asked.

"That when Dean was walking home a wendigo took him." Sam's voice broke a little. "And it's all because you two got into some _stupid_ fight." He chuckled humorlessly. "You know, I never heard him so scared except when the hell hounds came. It might have something to do about him being a girl and maybe everything he feels is magnified or something but all I know is that he was, and probably still is, terrified."

"Sam!" Gabriel yelled causing lightning to strike somewhere in the distance. "It's not Castiel's fault." He turned to Castiel now. "Cassie, don't listen to Sam. He's just worried about Dean. No I suggest that we all help out to find something to know where that monster took him."

**X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X**

_ Fuck_ did Dean's head hurt. _'What the hell happened?'_ he thought as he tried to rub his head but failed because his wrists were tied together with rope above his head. He looked around and noticed that he was in a tunnel most likely underground. He also saw another person not far from him. He tried to call out to them but his voice wouldn't cooperate. His throat hurt like a bitch.

He faintly remembers being at a bar then getting into a fight with someone about something. Why couldn't he remember who was there? Then he remembers walking back to the bunker talking to someone on the phone and hearing something in the bushes. He also remembers running and calling someone saying he was being followed and needed help. Ah, right. The wendigo got him.

His head snapped up as he heard the other person scream. _'Whoever it was that I called,'_ Dean thought to himself, _'please get here soon.'_

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**_I'm a bitch to Dean, I know. You think _****this****_ is evil for him, wait till next time. But, hey, at least there's gunna be a lot more Destiel (and maybe Sabriel but I'm not sure yet) next chapter. I've got great plans for this story's next few chapters(: Till next time!_**


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry if this chapter is kinda confusing a bit. I didn't edit the whole thing 'cause I'm being too damn lazy.**

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It took two days. Two days for the five of them to find out where the wendigo brought the elder Winchester. Sam and Cas were the ones who were- and still are- the most freaked out about this. They are gunna stay freaked out until they bring Dean back.

Castiel knew he shouldn't take what Sam said a few days ago personally but he couldn't help but feel guilty about Dean's disappearance. And it all happened just because of a demon. Sure Meg was Cas' friend but Dean was more important and he should have never left him in the first place.

"When we get there," Sam said snapping him from his thoughts, "you and I will get Dean while Gabriel kills the son of a bitch." Castiel nodded. They were in the Impala on the way to their destination. He and Sam haven't talked much since the night the wendigo took Dean. Cas felt too guilty and Sam's been too angry and they both were too worried about the elder Winchester.

"I'm sorry, Sam, for being the reason Dean's in danger," he finally said. "You were right. If it weren't for that fight then he'd be safe right now." Castiel's voice broke at the end of the sentence. He dropped his gaze from the window to his hands that were in his lap.

The former angel heard Sam sigh. "Look, Cas, what I said then, I didn't really mean it. I was just scared out of my mind. It's not your fault." He looked over to Castiel. "I know he means a lot to you, like he means a lot to me, but in a different way." He looked back to the road. "You love my brother, or at least you like him a lot. And we're going to find him."

Castiel flushed red. "H-how did you know?" He stuttered.

"The younger Winchester chuckled softly. "It's kinda obvious; the way you look at him and how you put him before all things- even your faith in heaven. And, Cas, I honestly think that he likes you too. Just, uh, don't do anything about it yet 'cause I know he hasn't come to terms with his feelings yet."

"And you're not bothered by it?" Castiel asked him.

"Not at all. You're good for him. Don't tell him I told you this but every time you leave he's an emotional wreck. He seriously can't manage without you. So Can you promise me that you won't leave him like that again?"

"I promise," Castiel assured. They drove the rest of the way in silence.

**X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X**

Dean wasn't sure how long he's been trapped down there. He only knew that it felt like days. He's barely able to stay awake because of the lack of food and water.

He was starting to doubt that whoever it was that he called days ago was going to come and help him. It really bothers Dean that he can't remember anyone that he knew. He remembers everything about himself but nothing about any friends or family.

He was about to pass out when he heard footsteps. At first he stiffened because he was the only person left down here but her relaxed a bit when he realized that it wasn't the footsteps of the wendigo; it was human footsteps! He tried hard to scream but nothing came out, just a bunch of air.

"Dean!" He heard a deep, gravelly voice yell.

"Dean!" A different voice screamed.

"Dean-o!" Yet another voice called out. Dean tried hard to scream or make some noise to attract their attention but still nothing came out. So he decided to breathe heavily even though it hurt like a bitch. He heard some footsteps come closer to him.

"Dean!" He heard the deep voiced man yell. "Over here!" He called to the other people. Dean forced his eyes open a bit and saw three men. One he noticed was freakishly tall making the other two, especially the one with blond hair, look tiny. The other man had dark brown or maybe black hair. He couldn't tell through the blur. As the tall guy cut the ropes above Dean's head that held his hands together and the dark haired mad hold on to him so he won't fall, the wendigo came. Dean stiffened but soon there was a bright light. He didn't know what happened next because the world around him turned black.

**X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X**

When he saw Dean's green eyes close and feel his body become more limp than before Castiel began to panic. "You guys! Dean passed out! We need to get back to the bunker quick!" The fallen angel didn't have to yell because the other two men were right beside him but he was too much in a panic.

"Cassie," Gabriel said. "Dean didn't eat or drink anything in a few days. I doubt he slept at all 'cause how could you while being like that?" Castiel and Sam glared at him because he was not helping at all. The archangel sighed and placed two fingers on Dean's head to heal him then he made a concerned face. "I fixed his hunger and thirst and he's gunna be sleeping for the next few hours but there's something else wrong with him. I think it's memory loss but different."

"What the hell does that mean?" Sam asked.

"It means it's not the usual memory loss. I don't know what he'll know and what he won't. We'll just have to wait," Gabriel told them. Sam sighed.

"Okay, well let's get him back to the car and back to the bunker so he can rest better." He helped Castiel lift Dean and bring him to the car's back seat. Cas sat in the back with him while Sam drove. Both of them were silent the whole time.

Once they were back at the bunker and Dean was in his bed, Sam and Cas waited in his room to wake up. When ten hours past they were both feeling a bit hungry so they went to the kitchen to get food. Gabriel was supposed to bring them food an hour ago but he never came back. Once they got to the kitchen, though, there was a knock at the door. Sam and Castiel looked at each other and Sam pulled out his gun and they made their way to the main door.

With the taller man pointing his gun at the door, Castiel opened it quickly just to find that there was no threat. It was just Kevin Tran. Sam put his gun down and the former angel ushered Kevin inside.

"Kevin, what are you doing here?" Castiel asked him.

Kevin gave them a confused look. "Um, hasn't Dean told you by now? He said for me to stay here since Crowley found Garth's place," the prophet explained. A pang of guilt shot through Cas because if he didn't get in a fight with Dean then Deanwould have told them and Dean would be awake.

"Oh, well, uh, Dean's asleep right now. He was attacked by a wendigo a few days ago and needs to rest," Sam told him. Kevin wasn't looking at Sam, though. He was looking over his shoulder.

"Who the hell are you people?" A familiar voice screamed from behind them. Sam and Castiel both turn around quickly to see Dean pointing a gun at them.

**X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X*X**

When Dean opened his eyes, the first thing he noticed was that he wasn't where he was when he blacked out; he's in his room in the bunker. The next thing he noticed was that he was comfortable and warm, not cold and in pain. He stood up to stretch, feeling a bit dizzy, and made his way to the closet to get a pair of clothes to change into. He grabbed a pair of sweat pants and a sweater that he knows some girl gave him to borrow during his time as a girl. He just couldn't remember who the fuck it was.

He was about to leave his room to get some food but he heard knocking at the front door of the bunker. He quickly grabbed his gun and slowly made his way to the front door. The knocking didn't continue and he stopped in his tracks when he heard muffled speaking. Was somebody already here? But who would else besides him would know about the Men of Letters bunker? He continued his way to the front.

"Oh, well, uh, Dean's asleep right now. He was attacked by a wendigo a few days ago and needs to rest," someone said. Dean stopped walking at the door way that leads from the dining area to the front. He saw three men who he didn't recognize. He pointed his gun up at them.

"Who the hell are you people?" He screamed from behind. The two men that weren't facing him spun around quickly to face him. Nobody answered so he yelled again. "I said: Who the hell are you?" Dean didn't exactly know who these three were but his brain was screaming, telling him that they are important so he cautiously put the gun down.

"Dean?" The freakishly tall man asked. "Do you seriously not remember us?" Dean looked at them closely. He looked from the tall man, to the teen, then to the other dark haired. He recognized the tall man's height and the other man's bright blue eyes, but he doesn't recall the Asian man.

"You two," he said pointing to tall man and blue eyes. "You two are the ones who saved me. I know there were three men and you," he said pointing to the teen, "Were not one of them. Where's the short dude?"

"That's all you remember about us?" Tall man asked, clearly hurt. Dean shrugged.

"It's weird. I remember everything about myself abut nothing about anybody else." Well, that's not even right. "Well, I remember that my mom, uh, died when I was four because of a douche bag yellow eyed demon that also killed my dad. I remember Hell and that angels are real and are dicks with wings. I remember that I was the true angel condom for Michael. I remember Leviathans and Purgatory. So basically my life story with no living people." He looked them over. "I know that I know you three, though, since my brain is saying that you guys are important. So, introduce yourselves I guess. Names and how you know me."

The tall man spoke first. "I'm Sam Winchester, your younger brother. You practically raised me on your own since you were four, when dad started hunting for yellow eyes." Dean felt awful. How had he forgotten his own brother? His brother that he practically raised since he was four?

The blue eyed man spoke now. "I'm Castiel and I'm the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition." First he forgot his brother but he also forgot the angel who is the only reason he's up and kicking today?

"Oh, so you're the angel from last night?" Dean asked, recalling the bright, white light from the previous day. Obviously, judging by Castiel's face, he wasn't.

"No, that was Gabriel. I lost my grace about two weeks ago to ensure your safety from other angels." Dean felt a pang of guilt from this. So he caused an angel, not just any angel, the angel who went to Hell to save him, to lose his grace? But why would he do that for him?

"So what, is this an 'Angel With a Shotgun' type of thing?" He asked them.

"In a way, I guess," Sam replied.

"I don't understand. I'm no longer an angel and I don't have a shotgun so how would that make sense?" Castiel questioned with his eyes squinted and head tilted. Dean chuckled a little.

"No, Cas, it's a song. You really need to listen to some music," Dean told him but then he noticed something he said. "It's alright if I call you 'Cas', right?"

Castiel smiled brightly. "Of course it is Dean. You're the one who first gave me that nickname years ago." The two stared into each other's eyes for a long while and Dean noticed that Cas' eyes are unbelievably blue. It's the bluest blue he has ever seen. Their staring, though, was cut off by a cough.

"Well, I'm Kevin Tran, ex-advanced placement, current prophet of the lord," the shortest man said. Dean couldn't believe this. Kevin was only a teen and his life got fucked up already with this destiny crap?

"You're joking right?" Dean asked, hoping the answer would be 'yes.' When no one answered he spoke again. "Seriously? How old are you?"

"Nineteen," Kevin replied.

"Nineteen?" Dean was pissed now. "You know what? I say you're not a prophet anymore so screw God and what he thinks."

"Dean," Castiel said. "He can't just stop being a prophet, it doesn't work like that." Dean looked to Cas now.

"You know what, Cas? Screw you too. I remember people always telling me that me and, uh, Sam that we couldn't stop the apocalypse because it was destiny but we still did unless you see half the world gone and the Croatoan Virus going around." He turned back to face Kevin again. "So, you're not a prophet anymore. Go to college, become a doctor, hell, be the president if you want. You can have a life now that's not controlled by heaven. You know what, you too, Cas."

"What do you mean?" Castiel asked.

"Well, you're human now, it's your chance to live a normal, happy, apple pie life with a wife and children and maybe even a pet or two; things that I couldn't have." Dean saw that Castiel was taken aback by what he said.

"Dean, I can't-"

"Damn it, Cas! You can! I was able to have a normal life for a year and if I can, anyone can." Damn, Dean felt like a freakin' guidance counselor. "Tell him, Sam. You seem like you had tried to have a normal life."

Sam cleared his throat. "Uh, yeah, it's possible. But, Dean, the last time he left, you flipped out at him."

"How long ago was that?"

"Well, he just came back here about a week ago and he left a little more than a week before that, so, like, two or three weeks ago," Sam informed him. Okay, well change of tactics then. Dean wasn't sure why but he felt like Cas deserved a normal life.

"Okay, then how many times have you died?" Dean asked the former angel. Castiel looked like he was concentrating hard.

"Three times," Castiel told him.

"Okay," Dean said. "And how many of those three times was it because of me and/or Sam?" When Castiel broke eye contact Dean knew the answer. "See, this is exactly why you should live a normal life. People who know us, who are important to us, they end up dying because of us." Even though Dean meant what he was saying, for some reason he didn't want Castiel to go. Thankfully, Sam spoke up.

"But, Dean," he said. "Cas is inexperienced hunter as a human so he'd be in more danger if he's out on his own."

"He's got a point, you know," said a different voice making Dean jump. So this must be the angel, Gabriel. Looking at him, his brain didn't exactly say that he was important like the others; it was more saying that this man was a major dick.

"So, you're Gabriel, I'm guessing."

"You got it!" He said with a smirk as he pulled made candy appear in his hand. "Anyway, I brought you some study material for your little noodle there," he said poking Dean's head.

"What are you talking about?"

"Well surely you remember the Supernatural series by the prophet Chuck, right? Well, here you go!" He said, dropping a bag of books in front of him. "Read about your life. Well, most of it anyway. Kind of…" Dean stared at the books in front of him. There were so many!

"Dude, I'm not reading all of these. The last time I read them it was creepy." Dean shuddered as he remembered reading the books last time. Well, he didn't exactly remember what happened in the books but he remembered feeling creeped out by them.

"Well, Dean-o, you don't have much of a choice since you've gotta get your memory back somehow and this is the easiest way." Gabriel looked over and Sam and Castiel. "Oh, right." He left but came back in less than five seconds with a take-out bag from some diner and he handed it to them. "Here's your food like I said I'd bring."

"That was hours ago, Gabe," Sam told him.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever Samquatch, at least I brought it." Gabriel looked back to Dean. "What are you still doing here? Read on, Dean-o." Dean rolled his eyes and picked up the bag and went to his room. It's gunna be a long night for him.

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**So I'm probably only gunna update every other weekend since obviously every week isn't working out for me. Anyways, sorry if this chapter kinda sucked ass but I hope you liked the chapter(: Reviews?**


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